I just took a handful of ibuprofen and flashed back to high school. No, not an actual drug-related flashback. No, not a Peggy Sue Got Married sort of thing. Just plain-ole memory recall induced by handfuls of ibuprofen.
See, a friend of mine and I managed to obtain two full-size lockers and two half-size lockers instead of the standard issue one of either. We knew we were indebted to a mighty benefactor; we used those lockers for purposes goodly and true. The full-size ones held traditional classroom fare accented by sardonic teenage decor. The half-size ones were a little homier: one held pilfered art & craft supplies for obscure hallway projects and birthday celebrations; the other held cereal, dishware, and more painkillers than you'd think two long blonde honor student band geeks could store in good conscience.
Aspirin, ibuprofen, Excedrin, Advil, Vicodin, Demerol, Robitussin for good measure...and I'm forgetting at least three more of the prescription variety. Oh, and some prescription allergy medicine that was later recalled. Nothing we'd get in trouble for and plenty of it!*
But the pain. I had headaches; Julie's hips ground bone-to-bone. Our doctors said to ignore the dosage directions. We did. We also followed a sort of pill crop rotation based on ads for Neutrogena shampoo. Julie's use habits caused her to regularly run into doorframes and resort to cleavage display in chemistry class. Mine created an elaborate and controlled relationship to pain. I never took too many too often; I'd attempt to build my pain tolerance by withholding caplet favor.
The result? I don't understand the 1-10 scale of pain at all. Seems to me that no matter how I feel, I could always feel worse. Sometimes the drugs themselves make me feel worse (the wisdom teeth incident was rather unfortunate). I prefer to have cavities filled without novocaine.
Or maybe I'm stretching the truth a bit under the haze of nostalgia. It's true that I categorize the worst pain I've felt as a 6 with future pain in mind, but it's certain that if I had health insurance I'd be waving my empty prescription bottle at the pharmacist at 3am.
*This was in the days of "as long as you have parental permission," not like now when even cough drops can get you suspended.
Posted by Ida at October 11, 2002 02:13 PM