I realize everyone knows this already, but you know what is a total pain in the ass? Guest lists. Whatever that between Yellow Dog and myself there are 134 people in our families. Whose fucking idea was that?
In other news, I find that I am self-conscious and shy all of a sudden. Not constantly, just in certain situations where attention is suddenly on me. See anything that has to do with wedding accessories or friendly gatherings or saying "fiancé," but especially my hands.
It's like this: I am absolutely aware of my hands all of the time now. Like, am I holding my hands this way so that my ring can be seen? Or, did I used to hold my hands like this? Or, am I staring at my hands all of the time? Or, is everyone staring at my hands all of the time?
The last time I remember being so aware of a part of my body was during puberty and the advent of breasts. Now, I know that just like then, I am far more aware of the new thing than anyone else around me. But no one says "What are your future plans for your breasts?" or "Have you set a date for your breasts yet?" or "Have you determined your criteria for cutting down your guest list to your breasts?" or "Have you thought about what you will wear for your breasts?" (Okay, that came up occasionally.)
I'm suddenly being asked all sorts of questions about something that is just as personal as those new breasts. But considering how much I actually like my breasts, I'll probably get used to some of the attention directed towards my wedding. (And I really should say that I have no trouble talking about it when it comes to close friends or family or perfect strangers, it's just those nebulous folk, you know, the people I never like to talk to about anything.)
Posted by Ida at September 20, 2005 12:31 PMI think it was precisely for these reasons that wedding planners came into being - they do most of the talking, so you don't have to.
Of course, you still have to talk to them...
Posted by: KING COMTE I at September 20, 2005 02:34 PMNah, planning isn't the problem (except for the guest list which is tricky because we cannot invite all of our friends...DC the Electrician suggested that everyone who cannot be invited get a free sixer of Schlitz). It's just the attention. Like, from people at work (all eight of the places) that I don't know very well or from getting just a little too much notice when there are also lots of other people in the room.
But I'm getting used to it. No harm in stocking up on some good general love and appreciation when it's so difficult to come by most times.
Posted by: ida at September 20, 2005 11:09 PMYeah, grab it whilst you may. You'll be "old news" by next week, and it'll be someone else's turn to hog the spotlight.
Posted by: KING COMTE I at September 21, 2005 02:49 PMSo now I have to worry about getting caught staring at your hands for too long? Damn, these rules are complicated.
Posted by: flamingbanjo at September 22, 2005 09:31 AMJust think of the complications if I happen to be touching where you're staring...
Posted by: ida at September 22, 2005 09:47 AM"Have you determined your criteria for cutting down your guest list to your breasts?"
Dude, the guest list for my breasts has always been, like, two, maybe three at most. You mean if I get engaged I'll have to cut it down further than that?
Posted by: molly at September 22, 2005 05:01 PMI was thinking more along the lines of someone being asked, at the onset of puberty, how many people were planned to have access to the breasts during one's life.
Y'know, kinda like that list they make you write up at Planned Parenthood for your nether regions.
Posted by: ida at September 22, 2005 06:00 PM