I mentioned to Yellow Dog the other day that it doesn't seem probable that I'm going to France so soon because France is physically so far away.
Luckily, time does not run solely on metaphor: I'm not always half-way there. The days have passed quickly and I'll be boarding a plane this time next Monday.
In the meantime, this week is jam-packed with finishing up a year's worth of teaching: final paperwork, one more class, and many meetings.
Last week, one of my students said "you use complicated words." Sort of. She didn't say complicated, but I forgot to write down exactly what she said. She meant big words, but she said it in a way that meant that sometimes she is supposed to use those words, too, but it makes her brain hurt.
See also: I still don't speak any French. But I did print out my TGV ticket while on the French version of the website...because it's cheaper that way. Which I guess means if everyone I encounter writes down what they plan say to me and only use basic ideas I might be able to figure out what is going on. But I still wouldn't be able to communicate with them. Okay, I know many many people speak English, but it makes me feel just a tiny bit, um, lame.
My mother's boyfriend has two kids, ages 6 and 7. The 6-year-old was studying English the other day and kept asking his dad things like "do you know how to say 'tractor' in English?" After a long list, they realized he wasn't studying for school and so asked why he was learning so many new English nouns. "Because [Ida's Mom's] daughter is coming in two weeks and I want to talk to her."
Yep, pretty much square there: this little boy and I will get along swimmingly by just reciting lists of French and English nouns back and forth to each other. It's one step below "Chaka, when the walls fell."
Posted by Ida at April 16, 2007 10:28 AMI think you might be mixing up Star Trek and Land of the Lost.
Posted by: flamingbanjo at April 16, 2007 01:24 PMI haven't ever seen Land of the Lost, but I sure loved that episode of Star Trek.
Posted by: ida at April 16, 2007 02:25 PMchaka no like aftershock.
Posted by: sean at April 16, 2007 02:40 PMBased on my experience of several years ago, you should find that most everyone you encounter speaks passable English, and by "passable" I mean they will tell you their English-speaking isn't very good, but 99% of the time their English will be much better than your _____, because what they are really saying is, "I only studied English for five years in secondary school, and I only use it colloquially about twice a week".
Also, with the French, it really helps to pose every interaction as a problem you need them to help you solve, as for example, "I'm terribly sorry, but I'm lost. Could you tell me how to find Rue d' _____?" And even though you are American, and you are making them speak English, which under normal circumstances would make them either actively ignore your or drip condescension upon you like honey from a hive, instead, they will be polite and helpful, because you're acknowledging your inherent inferiority by: A.) not butchering their native language; and B.) admitting your complete inability to read a map written in said language.
Once they realize you are ceding them this level of superiority, they're actually quite pleasant people with which to deal.
Posted by: COMTE at April 16, 2007 02:56 PMThat episode of Star Trek was used to provide a teaching moment in a course on Greek classics I took. Why? Because it was awesome.
I have a book called Street French 2: the Best of French Idioms. You can read it on the plane. Par example:
"On n'apprend pas à un vieux singe à faire la grimace."
which means:
"You can't teach an old monkey to smile."