this imploding heart

Closer, let me whisper in your ear.

Sometimes I wonder if I'll regret this when my fingers aren't moving as stumble-fluidly and the swish swash drinking glass of the world turns into the both-my-feet-have-fallen-asleep-and-I-can't bear-to-lift-my-head-from-my-desk-so-how-can-I-help-you-oh-man-I-want-to-die.
Oh honey. Sugar Sugar Loaf of Love. Friday was good sketch in uncomfortable chairs ala Daniel and Dina followed by running into everyone in the world.
One of the guys on stage was a stranger until he came out as the undercover cop in drag with the cop glasses and the moustache. I met him in that costume on the halloween party night where I dressed as the hulk and Alisha was Jackie Onasis and we hit up every party in town old school rocking your house prettiest mutant and ex first lay-day around. Moustaches change everything. D and D went to D's to dye D's hair white and I walked up to the Elysian to go to Emmaz's farewell party. Ran into a common acquaintance who said someone mentioned Buttery Nipples before leaving the brewery, so I immediately assumed they'd gone to Linda's to get schnockered proper.
Damn if I didn't go through every non-gay bar on the Pike/Pine strip and run into everyone except the kids I was looking for. Linda's was Jack and Jessica. Cha Cha was scientists. Capitol Club was ConWorks. That, and every time I came out of a bar the same guy would stumble toward me and say "DAAAAAAMN Girl! You got skin like nothin I ever seeeeeeen! Uh!". Every damn bar! How did he know? I finally lost him when he started serenading a stalled Volvo.
Rolled into Bill's off Broadway last because I just didn't pin Emma as a Bill's kind of girl, but Alisha had thrown in her 2 cents. Bills is a damn fine establishment. Kicked out at last call, some car re-parking and a glorious secret end to the dry streak. Mm Mm.
"Well, what do you want to be when you grow up?"
"The most charming girl you know."

Oh Saturday. You are my favorite boyfriend. You are syndicated cartoons in the morning and disney failure cartoons (see: Oliver and Company) all afternoon. You are spent entirely in bed with an ice pack and 3 glasses of EmergenC. You are a much needed phone call from Patrickt to discuss hating everything. You are home made biscuits and gravy. I'm getting really good at baking simple things finally. Christmas Parties.

"Okay. Lets say you went on a date and you both have the other's number."
"I don't have to date anymore. I'm in love."
"I know that, mister face. That's why I said 'lets say'."
"Mister face?"

Sunday, If I didn't know you better I'd think you were trying to kill me.

And she looks at me like I know what's going on."We'll start off with a brief quote by Sonya Walker."

We will? Oh shit. Oh shitty shit shit. Okay, don't panic. Reach in your pocket and.....Presto! Damn good thing you wore the red coat and are pretty good at impromptu speaking.

KPLUstaff holiday party with Jeremy the badass mothershut your mouth. I'm just talking about Jeremy. He's a grand prize winner! I was also a winner! Winning is fun.

Everything after that is a secret.

Posted by Sonya at December 16, 2002 08:57 AM