this imploding heart

Does it come with rustleing leaves? I'll take it!

Man, It really looked like I was going to do some work there for a second! good thing I've got my head on straight.

AND NOW, THE MOMENT YOU'VE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR:

SONYA'S HALLOWEEN HALL OF FAME (formerly known as sonya's Halloween Greatest Hits or something like that. I put on a costume on my lunchbreak!)

When I was four, my parents had already gone through 16 years of parenting, so they pretty much let me do whatever I wanted*. And I wanted to be a Honker from Sesame Street. It was one of those Plastic-Bag-in-Child-Shape-and-Mask getups, and I thought I was SMOKIN hot. My friend Wesley had a similar costume, except his plastic bag had pictures of wires on it and said R2D2 in big block letters on the front, and his mask didn't honk. He was already in Kindergarten, and I was jealous.

So when I actually was in kindergarten, I dressed up as a Little Dutch Girl. My mom let me wear a dress that had laces across the bust, and she made me a little white hat. I was in the costume parade at school, the photographs of which capture me Vogue-ing for the first time. Strike a pose, little dutch girl.

Lets skip ahead to my most socially awkward years.

I was a really, really weird kid in the first place. I had big existential beliefs and I couldn't help but randomly burst into song (which landed me in the principals office several times. seriously. for singing. I couldn't stop.). In sixth grade, I painted a bunch of wire hangers, tied up a bunch of colored scarves, secured myself a bodysuit and went as 'A Great Idea'.
Nobody got it.

The year after that, I taped a bunch of empty cereal boxes with plastic knives stuck in them all over my body and went as a Cereal Killer.

Skipping ahead to high school, where I was still regarded as pretty weird but had stopped caring much, costume wearing started taking place on a fairly regular basis. Idaho had me feeling artistically stifled, and again, parents didn't care so much about what I did up to a very specific point. However, in my Sixteenth year, on Halloween night, I did one of the dumbest/funnest things ever. I went to my first rave and I started dating a guy 6 years my senior. Both of these things were very fun, but very very dumb.

2 or 3 years ago, I was housesitting for some very clean gay men. Tim and James and I did some major, very messy, pumpkin carving. I carved a dinosaur that came out looking like a bulbasaur. Tim carved the scarriest thing he could think of, which I think ended up being the quadratic equation. The clean gay men came home a day earlier than I thought they would, and found the kitchen covered in pumpkin guts. I felt bad. I gave them my jack-o-pokemon.

and this year, I'm really hoping to get my hands on one of those bad one piece red swimming suits, slap on a pair of support hose and some high heels, add a sash and a tiara, and I'm Miss Idaho, muthafucka!

*see also: not brush my teeth. never wear socks. make sandwiches for the dog.

Posted by Sonya at October 31, 2003 02:05 PM