July 16, 2004

just because they knew your name

I can't believe I fucking forgot about this!

Roxy and I saw Murder by Death at Graceland last week, and everyone in the world was cornering, close talking and trying to sidewind us.

A girl Roxy knows was at the show, and although she was a perfectly nice person, she's one of those girls who attatches herself to you even if she didn't arrive with you. And then blows her cigarette smoke all over you. I never understand smokers who don't watch where the smoke is going. Seems rude, like drinking directly out of the beer pitcher.

So, Smoky is at the show with a gaggle of boys who're drunk enough that when Smoky introduces us, they're barely able to contain the facial expressions that scream "I WANNA PUT MY PENIS IN THAT! I CAN'T LET ANY OF THE OTHER PENISES GET THERE FIRST!" By way of introduction, Smoky says "Sonya, Roxy, meet Can and Adian. They're from Canada. Don't you want to kiss a Canadian?"

"Thanks for the offer, but I think we'll pass this time."

"Come on! They're so cute!"

Okay now. Who introduces someone they've just met to some guys she's just met and then tries to force them to kiss? First graders, that's who.

Roxy and I do our best to take our conversation elsewhere, when a guy walks up to us. "Hey girls, can I take your picture?"

"Sure"

"Okay, could you hold these flyers?"

Roxy and I look at what he's got in his hand. They're glossy, blue and white airbrushed flyers for Hoobastank. What. The. Fuck.

"Whoa! Nevermind, dude. Sorry. Good luck with your little ad campaign."

Doesn't it seem like, if someone's using your image to sell their product, that they're supposed to pay you? Something like that?

Hoobastank. Ha!

The Canadians then attacked us in the hallway and gave us weird hugs without permission. But Murder by Death was a Rock n Fuckin Roll band.

Posted by Sonya at July 16, 2004 09:28 AM
Comments

yeah, no hugs without permission. well, unless they're from you. you can give me all of the permission-less hugs you want to.

Posted by: roxy at July 16, 2004 02:43 PM

I try very hard to keep my "I WANNA PUT MY PENIS IN THAT" face under control. Maybe in Canada they just don't get that sort of training.

Posted by: UnderwearNinja at July 16, 2004 04:55 PM

"The Hoobastank Gambit" (Hm, I think I just made up the title for the next Matt Damon movie) sounds like one of those "street team" marketing thingies -- where 40 year-old ponytail & Thom McCann wearing former hipsters at advertising agencies coerce ordinary kids IN YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD to spread the word on the latest Corporate Fadboy Band, thus giving them a sort of "street cred", but not realizing of course that this puts them about three years behind the curve of the "viral marketing" strategy, which pretty much everybody NOT working at an advertising agency has already rejected.

Posted by: THE COMTE at July 16, 2004 05:05 PM

I reserve that face for underpants.

Posted by: ian at July 17, 2004 09:37 AM

Hoobastank lit a FIRE under the ASS of the UK music scene!!

They rock*

*of course not.

Posted by: hoobaIAN at July 17, 2004 09:41 AM

oh how embarassing for us non-huggy, non-hoobastank loving Canadians. I swear, we don't all have crappy taste in music!

Posted by: kimmikim at July 19, 2004 10:35 AM

anytime you start a post with "I can't believe I fucking forgot about this!" I'm there.
hoobawhatie? thanks for the laff!

Posted by: Wow at July 19, 2004 12:57 PM

If hoobastank sucked any harder...well, I guess they'd be Nickelback. And I'd rather poo on my hand and punch myself in the face than listen to either.

Posted by: aaron at July 22, 2004 08:30 PM