September 27, 2004

First there is a mountain, then there is no mountain, then there is

Man, I really hope you're right about this.

Because when it's all over, I don't want to find out that all along my creator was actually a giant sandwich, and all my life I've been eating sandwiches and thus eliminating my only chance at an afterlife by infuriating my Breaded Master.

Hey, do you think the sandwich is ever going to go out of style? I mean, if the Earl of Sandwich asked for meat between bread in 1762 and we've been eating sandwiches ever since, do you think there's a possibility it can become an obsolete method of preparing foods? Like eating cats, dogs and horses; when did they become cute enough to not eat? Bunnies are cute. Tons of people eat bunnies. They're RODENTS, for sandwich sake. Eating cats must have just gone out of style at some point in our culture and we've yet to pick it back up.

Bunnies are delicious, but they scream like a child when they know you're coming for them.

My mom called me last night to tell me that Mount St. Helens is expected to erupt again this week. As always, she asked me to put some water aside. I usually blow her off on that kind of thing, but have you seen the news lately? Nature is going absolutely apeshit. Maybe I should buy a box of dust masks.


(Is everyone who died prior to 1762 going to meet their Breaded Master by default?)

Posted by Sonya at September 27, 2004 01:51 PM
Comments

yes, nature is going apeshit, but this apeshit will result in possibly a little ash spewed into the air and lots of chopper shots of mt. st. helens smoking a cigar.

Posted by: benlau at September 27, 2004 10:56 PM

At least the news stopped showing the Great Dane and her 17 puppies.

Where's my water-skiing squirrel?

(But emergency gallons of water is always a good idear.)

Posted by: ida at September 28, 2004 09:04 AM

So the crucifix would be replaced by a BLT on a plate?

"My son was eaten with a side of potato salad for your sins."

(BTW, rabbits aren't technically rodents. They are lagomorphs. Tasty, tasty lagomorphs. Probably be great on a sandwich.)

Posted by: flamingbanjo at September 28, 2004 09:45 AM

Rabitt Fricasse is purdy durned good shtuff, maynard! Good luck with the smoking mountain.

Posted by: Wow at September 28, 2004 11:01 AM

Exploding mountains. Been there. Done that. Feh.

I'm thinking if the BLT were served open faced so that the criss-cross of bacon was visible, THEN you'd really have a "Jesuswich", but it also makes me wonder: does it have to be served on "Roman Meal" bread to count as The One True Sandwich?

And where does the slice of juicy dill pickle fit in the trinity?

Posted by: KING COMTE I at September 29, 2004 09:47 AM