Actually, I've been sleeping pretty well. Betty wakes up every three or four hours. She sleeps soundly right next to Mommy, which means that she doesn't like to sleep alone, which means putting her down, even when she's napping is not always an option. She wakes up after about five/ten minutes if I put her down to go do something while she's sleeping. I've created a monster. This does bring up a problem that there is no formal school of thought on. So you can chime in with your childcare advice if you like.
The question is:
What do you do with the baby when you have to go to the bathroom?
Taking her with me and holding her all the while is not an option. I can't one hand her, plus it just seems...wrong somehow.
I can put her down in her bouncy seat and just leave her crying. Which makes it very hard for me to pee or poop. I need to relax, people. The stress just makes it all take longer and then she starts doing that heart-breaking sobbing thing so when I get back she has actual big tears rolling down her cheeks.
I could take her in the bathroom and put her down...somewhere. So do I need a new bouncy seat for the bathroom? Lay her down in the empty tub? On the bathmat?
Bottom line (no that's not a pun or...hey shaddap!) I love my little precious beautiful girl baby.
I just have to say that a lot. She's really cute. Paul is singing "Hit me baby, one more time" to her to calm her down. Babies are awesome. She is getting so big. She's already 6 pounds.
Also, Prolactin is awesome. It's a chemical released when you (or rather, I) breastfeed that makes you and the baby sleepy. Pleasant sleepy. Like Vicodin. Mmmmm.
Posted by jlp716 at March 5, 2006 11:15 PMCallum (the younger one) slept on me for the first six months of his life. Yup. Me propped up on pillows, semi-upright, baby in arms. He nursed every two hours like clockwork.
(The upright thing was due to an oversupply of milk---apparently I was making enough for twins and he was happily gorging, so whenever I tried to lay him down to horizontal sleep, geysers would rush out, through his nose, waking him up with choking and mess and distress. I finally asked a lactation consultant for help, thusly figuring out the problem. With the second baby. With the first I was too distraught and completely overwhelmed to ever ask for help, exacerbating many already serious problems. Lesson learned: do not hesitate to ask for help with this baby stuff. EVER.)
So, yup, I did go the bathroom while holding him, many many times. Peeing, at least. You really need two hands for poop. At which point, bouncy chair in the bathroom, facing you.
Most mothers don't get to go to the bathroom alone, much less with the door closed, for a while. When Kevin is home I close the door, of course, but when he's not I have to keep an eye/ear on the kiddies while I'm going. You will find out soon enough how quickly they get into life-threatening danger and/or heartbreaking property destruction in the space of time it takes you to go.
Just be grateful that she's so light. Callum was 9 pounds at birth, up to 11 two weeks later, and well over 30 now (at 18 mos.)
As for one-handing her, put her upright with her head on your shoulder, butt in crook of elbow, hand on back of head.
Basically, you have to pick which is more stressful for you: Having her cry from being put down, or trying to hold her while you go? Either pick is fine, just pick and accept that stress will happen either way, and that it is temporary. This too will pass.
The baby will not suffer psychologically from this invasion of your privacy. They don't care. The point here is to figure out what works best for you, at this point in time. Whatever method brings the most comfort and peace to you (and thusly to the family) is the best. This is a pretty good rule of thumb for lots of stuff, like the co-sleeping and binky thing.
I'm glad to hear you're getting decent sleep! That is a HUGE thing. Real beneficence.
Of course babies don't like to sleep alone. Why would they? The funny thing is, we don't expect grownups to sleep alone. When someone's spouse is out of town and they say they have trouble sleeping alone, we sympathize, not call for counseling and intervention. Human and animal history is quite illustrative on this point.
I actually prefer to sleep alone, but that is just not an option right now. Aside from the kid, Kevin snores and I am a light sleeper. I am also completely off topic now.
Back to the bathroom: again, do what works for you. Betty will survive either way. You have the right (and genuine, inarguable need) to pee and poop.
Posted by: Lara O'Connor at March 7, 2006 08:50 AMSpeaking of poop, isn't the first one after giving birth completely terrifying?!
Posted by: Lara O'Connor at March 7, 2006 10:55 AMWould you like a sling? I could never get the hang of it, but some people swear by them. As with much else, I have one (wine/cream gingham checks) taking up space in my closet.
I ended up doing the whole "wear your baby" thing without any form of carrier, and as a result my left bicep rivals Sylvester Stallone's.
Hey, we can arm wrestle when we visit in the fall! Your baby-carrying arm will be big by then too.
Posted by: Lara O'Connor at March 7, 2006 11:58 AMThe first poop was b1zarre. We caught her in the midst of it so we watched it happen. It was like she was voiding a long green slimy alien from her butt that was going to take over the world.
She's sleeping right now with her mouth open. Catching flies. She's so cute.
I don't sleep well with others, except the baby. I'm a light sleeper and Paul snores. And is a major bed hog.
Posted by: JtotheP at March 7, 2006 11:14 PMI meant YOUR first poop after childbirth.
Posted by: Lara O'Connor at March 8, 2006 06:08 AMOh yeah. I felt like I was in a plane crash, bracing for impact.
And I don't need a sling. I've got this convertable thing that does a sling thing. But thanks very much. And thanks for the other stuff you sent. We've gotten much use out of them.
Posted by: JtotheP at March 8, 2006 01:38 PMYou could have a small sound-proof cabinet installed in your bathroom. So when you need to go you can just put her in the cabinet for a few minutes and let her scream her head off. Then when you're done you just take her out like nothing happened.
Voila!
Boy, I'm good at this stuff. I should have a kid.
Posted by: Joshua at March 13, 2006 09:10 AM